How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
