How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize