you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Randomize
