Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
