We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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