I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
