Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Randomize
