I feel like I'm in dance class right now
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Randomize
