I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Randomize