no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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