You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize