We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
