she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
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