How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
Someone signed my nipple.
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