I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
