let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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