hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
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