ya dads aren't the best wingmen
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
