When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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