I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
This is classic penis vs brain.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
