She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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