5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
