Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
