Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
We smell like vodka and hangover
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