before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
