did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize