If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Randomize
