..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Randomize
