So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
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