Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
