Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
