Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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