i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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