Non-Jews are for practice
4 words: hood of his car
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize
