R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
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