He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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