Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
