D3 body, D1 cock
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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