oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
