Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
