so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize