Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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