That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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