I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
He kissed a someone with a penis
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
