I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
You're breaking my sexual little heart
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
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