They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Two words: nipple clamps
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