you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
