yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
