Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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