I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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