I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Randomize
